Happy Halloween
Well, a day early. I'm not sure if I will be online tomorrow, so I just thought that I would do it now. Not surprisingly, I have to close tomorrow. I haven't had a Halloween off in, well, I can't remember how long. But I will be dressing up-sort of. I will be going as a Mormon missionary, which is close to the dress code for work. In fact, the only thing I'm lacking (besides a Book of Mormon) is a bicycle helmet. So if you have a spare one that you're willing to let me borrow, let me know.
I have no plans after work, other than a mysterious party request that I got on myspace today. I doubt I go, considering I don't know anyone who was invinted, or who invited me. Anywho, gotta run.
Take care,
Jeremy
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Five years later
Today marks the five year anniversary of Dad's death. So far, I am doing well, far better than what I was expecting to be. It hurts, but there are no tears, only memories. This, I know, is how he would have wanted it. This is how I wanted it to be.
I have changed much over the years. Life is much more fragile and short. Not in a doomsday kind of a way, but in a way where you appreciate every moment that you actually are alive. After you lose someone close, especially a parent, you are constantly aware that the life you live will make an impact, no matter how small, even after you're gone. And there will be far more people at your funeral than you would expect. Even people you haven't spoken to in years.
This blog will not be grim, for there is no need for it to be. The depression is gone, leaving only the good memories and the few remaining "could've been"s. The hardest part of moving on is letting go. Is finally forcing yourself to admit that they are not coming back; allowing this person to be dead in your mind. They have moved on, and eventually you will have to as well. This is both painful and liberating. And completely, entirely, necessary.
This year has been hard, but I'm not goining into that either. I don't want to, and I don't need to. Time has healed the wounds it has needed to, even as the memories remain. I knew this year would be hard, not in the extreme that it has been, but even that's okay. It allows me to put everything in perspective; and allows me to filter out just what I need and don't need in my life.
I'm not happy, but I'm used to not being happy. I've grown used to this emptiness. What I am happy for is that he no longer suffers. He is in a far better place than I am. For that, I am happy.
I need to leave now. I will be heading to the cemetery, then spend the rest of the evening at home. Tomorrow, hopefully, I will visit my grandmother. After that, I will go to work. Essentially, I will keep on living. I wish you all good luck and good health.
Take care of yourselves,
Jeremy
Today marks the five year anniversary of Dad's death. So far, I am doing well, far better than what I was expecting to be. It hurts, but there are no tears, only memories. This, I know, is how he would have wanted it. This is how I wanted it to be.
I have changed much over the years. Life is much more fragile and short. Not in a doomsday kind of a way, but in a way where you appreciate every moment that you actually are alive. After you lose someone close, especially a parent, you are constantly aware that the life you live will make an impact, no matter how small, even after you're gone. And there will be far more people at your funeral than you would expect. Even people you haven't spoken to in years.
This blog will not be grim, for there is no need for it to be. The depression is gone, leaving only the good memories and the few remaining "could've been"s. The hardest part of moving on is letting go. Is finally forcing yourself to admit that they are not coming back; allowing this person to be dead in your mind. They have moved on, and eventually you will have to as well. This is both painful and liberating. And completely, entirely, necessary.
This year has been hard, but I'm not goining into that either. I don't want to, and I don't need to. Time has healed the wounds it has needed to, even as the memories remain. I knew this year would be hard, not in the extreme that it has been, but even that's okay. It allows me to put everything in perspective; and allows me to filter out just what I need and don't need in my life.
I'm not happy, but I'm used to not being happy. I've grown used to this emptiness. What I am happy for is that he no longer suffers. He is in a far better place than I am. For that, I am happy.
I need to leave now. I will be heading to the cemetery, then spend the rest of the evening at home. Tomorrow, hopefully, I will visit my grandmother. After that, I will go to work. Essentially, I will keep on living. I wish you all good luck and good health.
Take care of yourselves,
Jeremy
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Odds and ends
So, first off, I would like to announce that I have a new cell phone. I lost my old one about two months ago, and I was in the position Monday to get a new one. Not only is it a new phone, but a new service as well. I used to be a Cingular customer, but since the majority of the people I call are on the Sprint network, I decided to make the switch. It's a camera phone-something I've never had before. And I plan on joining Twitter, because, well, now I can.
Second, work is keeping me crazy busy. For the month of October, I have had a grand total of one day off a week (hence how I can afford a new phone) and I was informed a few days ago to expect more hours in November and December; what with the upcoming holiday season and the strong possibility that one of my coworkers will be quitting. So, if you are looking for a place that will be hiring, we definitely have an opening.
Health wise, well, could be better, could be worse. Last week, for most of the week, I had a massive kidney attack a day-not fun. It's since calmed down, and I deduced that it was just due to the fact that I hadn't been drinking a lot of water around that time. Something that I have begun to do again. I got over the cold quickly thanks to plenty of Airborne and sleep. And speaking of sleep, with my crazy schedule, I haven't had any insomnia problems at all.
I've been writing more. You may have read the poem I posted on here and I've been writing short stories for a big writer's competition put out by Writer's Digest. I decided to acrew at least a dozen of them before I begin submitting them.
My sister may or may not be flying out for Thanksgiving again this year. The deciding factors are the price of tickets (now that she has to pay for a seat for the munchkin) and whether or not her husband has any different plans. I only found out about that today, so when I know more, I will let you know.
Anyway, I think that's it for now. I hope to post again soon.
Take care,
Jeremy
So, first off, I would like to announce that I have a new cell phone. I lost my old one about two months ago, and I was in the position Monday to get a new one. Not only is it a new phone, but a new service as well. I used to be a Cingular customer, but since the majority of the people I call are on the Sprint network, I decided to make the switch. It's a camera phone-something I've never had before. And I plan on joining Twitter, because, well, now I can.
Second, work is keeping me crazy busy. For the month of October, I have had a grand total of one day off a week (hence how I can afford a new phone) and I was informed a few days ago to expect more hours in November and December; what with the upcoming holiday season and the strong possibility that one of my coworkers will be quitting. So, if you are looking for a place that will be hiring, we definitely have an opening.
Health wise, well, could be better, could be worse. Last week, for most of the week, I had a massive kidney attack a day-not fun. It's since calmed down, and I deduced that it was just due to the fact that I hadn't been drinking a lot of water around that time. Something that I have begun to do again. I got over the cold quickly thanks to plenty of Airborne and sleep. And speaking of sleep, with my crazy schedule, I haven't had any insomnia problems at all.
I've been writing more. You may have read the poem I posted on here and I've been writing short stories for a big writer's competition put out by Writer's Digest. I decided to acrew at least a dozen of them before I begin submitting them.
My sister may or may not be flying out for Thanksgiving again this year. The deciding factors are the price of tickets (now that she has to pay for a seat for the munchkin) and whether or not her husband has any different plans. I only found out about that today, so when I know more, I will let you know.
Anyway, I think that's it for now. I hope to post again soon.
Take care,
Jeremy
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Autumn
Tuesday, October 14, 2008 6:15am
The trees are alive with a frozen fire
No smoke is emitted from these flames
Occasionally, an ember drifts to the ground
Or else a gust of wind blows it all away
Crisp air revives me
It is filled with the scent of the earth
The hot cider permeates the inside of me
And I emit steam from my nose and mouth
As if a fleshy dragon walked down the street
Summer has already died and winter has yet to arrive
Empty corpses of pumpkins line the streets
And illuminate the night
As the childrens’ minds slowly fill with knowledge
Their thoughts often drift to All Hallows Eve night
As baseball winds down and football begins again
I take a walk outside
To enjoy this all again
Tuesday, October 14, 2008 6:15am
The trees are alive with a frozen fire
No smoke is emitted from these flames
Occasionally, an ember drifts to the ground
Or else a gust of wind blows it all away
Crisp air revives me
It is filled with the scent of the earth
The hot cider permeates the inside of me
And I emit steam from my nose and mouth
As if a fleshy dragon walked down the street
Summer has already died and winter has yet to arrive
Empty corpses of pumpkins line the streets
And illuminate the night
As the childrens’ minds slowly fill with knowledge
Their thoughts often drift to All Hallows Eve night
As baseball winds down and football begins again
I take a walk outside
To enjoy this all again
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
The Cold and Flu Season is upon us.
Oh yes, it's that fun time of year for sniffling, sneezing, and all around achiness. Since I have been bombared with germs from customers, coworkers, friends, family, and random strangers, I too am partacking in the season.
Thankfully, it's just a cold. I normally get the flu this time of year, so I am definitely grateful for the downgraded version. I will be greatly surprised if I'm still sick, this time next week.
In other news, my mood has drastically improved this month so far. I made a goal to be as productive as I can this month; even if it's in little ways. I think that part of the problem with this year has been that I've been insanely busy, but rarely productive. I'm channeling and challenging myself and it seems to be working.
Also this month, I have been writing more. Already I have entered a short story contest through Writer's Digest and I hope to have more entries into a much larger contest that they are holding. It's been a while since I've written any poetry, so I might write some of that before the end of the month as well. If I do, and I like it, I will post it on here. So stay tuned.
Anyway, just a short post for now. I will write on here again soon.
Take care,
Jeremy
Oh yes, it's that fun time of year for sniffling, sneezing, and all around achiness. Since I have been bombared with germs from customers, coworkers, friends, family, and random strangers, I too am partacking in the season.
Thankfully, it's just a cold. I normally get the flu this time of year, so I am definitely grateful for the downgraded version. I will be greatly surprised if I'm still sick, this time next week.
In other news, my mood has drastically improved this month so far. I made a goal to be as productive as I can this month; even if it's in little ways. I think that part of the problem with this year has been that I've been insanely busy, but rarely productive. I'm channeling and challenging myself and it seems to be working.
Also this month, I have been writing more. Already I have entered a short story contest through Writer's Digest and I hope to have more entries into a much larger contest that they are holding. It's been a while since I've written any poetry, so I might write some of that before the end of the month as well. If I do, and I like it, I will post it on here. So stay tuned.
Anyway, just a short post for now. I will write on here again soon.
Take care,
Jeremy
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