The Pain of Letting Go
Monday, February 25th, 2008
Softly you sleep
Where your dreams take you
I do not know
Perhaps to another day
Perhaps to another life
One less cruel than this.
The IV sustains you
Prolongs a long lived life
Keeping you in this realm
Preventing you from going
To your true home.
I miss you
Before you’re even gone
Your honest smile
Your voiced concerns
Your many stories
And untold memories
Your mind
This slides down the slope
To an empty void
Escalating speed with each passing day
With no hope of slowing down.
Goodbye, my grandmother
These collective tears are for you
These worried thoughts are of you
We all miss you
Before you are even gone.
Showing posts with label dementia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dementia. Show all posts
Monday, February 25, 2008
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
I open this blog with a question: How valuable is a memory? There are parts of my life that I wish I did not recall, but I am able to recall them nonetheless. Then there are parts of my life that I hope I will never forget and cherish those memories. Times when life was well spent.
My grandmother is in the advanced stages of dementia. Alzheimer's is one branch of the dementia tree; just to give you an idea. Reality to her is like walking through a forest in the fog. Every now and then you see a tree, but you have no bearings as to where you are going. She still has memories of life long ago, and often gets them mixed up with her life today. For example, she will ask when my grandfather is going to work when he has been retired for some time. She will just ask in the middle of the day when he will be going home and he will explain to her that he is home.
You read that she was hospitalized last week with dehydration and a severe urinary tract infection. The dementia is most likely the cause of this. The consulting nurse that I met today explained that to me. She said that while our minds tell us that we are thirsty and we automatically get a drink of water; her mind receives the message that her body needs water and the message gets lost in the cobwebs. Same with the infection. She literally forgot she needed to use the bathroom.
I used the title of the movie for the title for this post for a reason. If you have seen the movie, you watched as the main character slowly lost the memory of the woman he loved. He made this decision voluntarily, but as the movie went on, he clung to the fast fading memory. This is similar to what is going on in her mind, only at a faster pace.
How valuable is a memory? Because you never know when it will be gone forever.
I open this blog with a question: How valuable is a memory? There are parts of my life that I wish I did not recall, but I am able to recall them nonetheless. Then there are parts of my life that I hope I will never forget and cherish those memories. Times when life was well spent.
My grandmother is in the advanced stages of dementia. Alzheimer's is one branch of the dementia tree; just to give you an idea. Reality to her is like walking through a forest in the fog. Every now and then you see a tree, but you have no bearings as to where you are going. She still has memories of life long ago, and often gets them mixed up with her life today. For example, she will ask when my grandfather is going to work when he has been retired for some time. She will just ask in the middle of the day when he will be going home and he will explain to her that he is home.
You read that she was hospitalized last week with dehydration and a severe urinary tract infection. The dementia is most likely the cause of this. The consulting nurse that I met today explained that to me. She said that while our minds tell us that we are thirsty and we automatically get a drink of water; her mind receives the message that her body needs water and the message gets lost in the cobwebs. Same with the infection. She literally forgot she needed to use the bathroom.
I used the title of the movie for the title for this post for a reason. If you have seen the movie, you watched as the main character slowly lost the memory of the woman he loved. He made this decision voluntarily, but as the movie went on, he clung to the fast fading memory. This is similar to what is going on in her mind, only at a faster pace.
How valuable is a memory? Because you never know when it will be gone forever.
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